Am I Really Narcissistic?

Am I Really Narcissistic?

I thought that the narcissistic nature was just a character flaw found in some, but what I’m now seeing is that being narcissistic is in the fallen human condition. We are all narcissistic to varying degrees. Humanity, without the Life of Christ, is motivated by self. Now I am not saying that everyone suffers from NPD (narcissistic personality disorder), or is a sociopath, or psychopath, but part of the independence found in the fall was an obscene self-focus to the exclusion of God. That’s right, exclusion!

Narcissistic Selfishness Heating Up

Narcissistic Selfishness Heating Up
We’re witnessing daily the love of most growing cold, and the increase of selfishness heating up. Our culture is literally inflamed with “self.” We are consumed with self-interests, self-promotion, and gratifying self. We have become our own lovers and it is only going to get worse.

You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They’ll consider nothing sacred. Unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. They’ll betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that!
2 Timothy 3:1-5

To be narcissistic means “having an excessive or erotic interest in oneself and one’s physical appearance. Vain, self-loving, self-admiring, self-absorbed, self-obsessed, conceited, self-centered, self-regarding, egotistic, egotistical, egoistic; informal ‘full of oneself.’” Does this not describe the human condition? I know some may say this is going too far, but it is my experience that I don’t have to dig very deep into someone’s motivation to find SELF at the core. And this illness is our fallenness! Again, not that everyone has the mental disorder of being a full-on narcissist, but each of us in the old nature is obscenely self-absorbed.

Narcissistic Since the Garden

Narcissistic Since the Garden
Is our current age worse than any other? As I stated, I think when we fell in the Garden, we exchanged our awareness of God for obsession with self. Our parting gift for choosing self over God was to not be able to see God but only our nakedness. So self as god has always been the issue. But I also believe that the closer we come to the return of Christ, the wheels will completely come off of humanity. And as we are seeing, there will be a massive increase in the levels of selfishness by the masses. Entitlement, shamelessness, the disregard for others in preference for self-centeredness—it’s all ramping up to go off the cliff.

Our only hope to escape our obsessive, obscene self-focus is to die. Why do I need to die? Because there is only One life who lives selflessly, and that is Christ. Jesus is the only one in the universe that lives for the Father. And His is the only Life that brings our Creator pleasure.

The Solution

The solution to our narcissistic nature is Christ’s life. What do we get in this transaction, since it is all about us? Eternal adventure and glory. Our incessant self-centered life is shown only to be a tragedy not ecstasy. The walls of SELF are confining and limiting. Jesus’ Life, on the other hand, is fascinating expanse and dynamic purpose. Self, with all its allure, is only a prison, whereas Christ in me is glory and destiny.

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    • tammy


      “…the closer we come to the return of Christ, the wheels will completely come off of humanity.”

      I had a conversation about these exact thoughts with another believer this week. She didn’t have much to say on the subject but wasn’t in total shock when I shared with her how I felt about all that seems to be coming apart in humanity and nature.
      As awful as it all seems, and as heart breaking as it can be – I just see each event as one-step-closer to His return.
      I am at peace in the midst of it all except for the fact that there are masses of the unsaved, this is what breaks my heart.

      “For this is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior, who desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.” 1 Timothy 2:4 NKJV

      HIS desire is that ALL men be saved.

      Praying that God will use this vessel for His purpose and to His glory. And that I will choose His will in how I walk this out for Him.

      • Pauline

        Thank you, Tammy . . . I “amen” your last sentence; in summary: “for Him.” Period.

      • shulamite

        Bless you, Tammy! This is the hope in all the self-love, that He is returning! I also have hope that He is moving parts and pieces together to bring about His salvation, love, and Life. Thank you for your compassionate heart! His Life shines in you like a beacon, and as you let that Light and Life shine, He will bring those who see it, to Himself. Love you muches!

    • Mary Baker

      As I opened Facebook the first thing I saw was today is national selfie day. Then I came upon this and thought Of God’s timing. Great article and challenge for us to die daily to self and draw close to God every moment of each day.

      • shulamite

        Oh my goodness Mary! That was a divine accident! How perfectly orchestrated by the Lord. Actually this post was pushed back a few weeks to post the ones on health. I had no idea that it was the Lord laying things out perfectly. Thank you so much Mary for commenting and telling me this, it is very encouraging! And I am so pleased the post spoke to you! Bless you!

    • Linda M

      TRUTH! To the penetrating and dividing asunder of soul and spirit, joints and marrow, thoughts and intents of the heart.
      The dividing asunder of self and The Seed Of Christ through Truth, Light and Life by the Spirit. God unites to Himself through division.

      Loving Him and you. Thank you, John.

      • shulamite

        Thank you Linda for commenting. And I am so pleased it resonated with you. It was certainly shocking to see. I need to write a post on how I have seen the Lord work the self-absorption out of people, including my own self-focus. Love you too and thank you for you!

    • Pauline

      Much needed topic, John — thank you!

      “I know that in me lies no good thing . . . ” Do I? Easy enough to spout so that others will recognize how humble I am. Living it before Him, in truth, is quite another thing.

      A favorite quote from Francis Frangipane:

      “There will be no “knights in shining armor” in God’s kingdom; our armor will have many dings and dents. No, no perfect Hollywood heroes will ride to save the day; just wearied saints to look to God and, in weakness, find Christ’s strength. This, indeed, is the essence of God’s kingdom: divine greatness manifest in common people,”

      Something Martha has said and lives by (I remember hearing this on tape years ago) is: “God is only impressed with His Son.” That’s a hard swallow for this egomaniac; God has kept it in my memory for a reason and your post today is yet another reminder.

      You bless me, John! Blessings back —

      • shulamite

        Thank you for the Frangipane quote. It is such good news that there is only One shining knight to all of our stories. And that He can manifest and live His Life in us…is amazing. Love you Pauline!

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