Our relationships are transitory in nature. Though most of us fight this, it’s our living reality. And you might ask, with all the lonely people in this world, why would God establish this world where no man can be our anchor? And why would He make it where all the human balls in life’s bingo match flip and turn consistently and constantly? There’s an answer and it’s an answer rooted into our DNA. There is only One permanent relationship, and that is with God our Creator.
I Feel Lonely and All Alone
Cigna Health released the results of a survey showing that many Americans say they often or always feel alone. Some of the findings are alarming:
- Nearly half of Americans (46%) report often or (47%) always feeling alone or left out.
- One in four Americans (27%) rarely or never feel as though there are people who really understand them.
- Two in five Americans (43%) often or always feel that their relationships are not meaningful and (43%) that they are isolated from others.
- One in five people (20%) report they rarely or never feel close to people or (18%) feel like there are people they can talk to.
Dr. Douglas Nemecek, M.D., chief medical officer for Behavioral Health at Cigna said, “At Cigna, we’ve been hearing more and more from our customers and individuals calling us that they’re feeling lonely, alone and disconnected from others.”
With all the lonely people out there in the world, how does God answer to the transitory nature of relationships? What does the Lord say about our being alone? Does He have a plan or solution to address loneliness? Well, here is how He addressed it in my life.
One Relationship Includes Them ALL
Early in my Christian life, God spoke this to me:
“I AM the seamless thread of your entire life. People will come and people will go, but I AM the One constant that includes them all. I AM your beginning and I AM your end. At the finish, all there will be is ME. This life is about Me!”
Yes, there is actually only ONE relationship in our lives and that is our relationship with God. Sure, we interact with many people in situations every day. We have relations with everyone from loved ones to store clerks. Yes, we connect with people all the time, but the reality is that even with all these interpersonal connections, there is still only ONE relationship in them all—GOD. I know this might sound extreme but it is nonetheless true. Certainly life is about God, first, foremost and throughout the length of our days. God is at the center of every aspect of our lives whether we acknowledge Him or not. God is our only source of Life and relationship. Everything that happens in this life is about God. Every interaction we have is about God.
This being said, loneliness is more about our perspective than reality. It isn’t that God doesn’t want us to have relationships with others—if this was the case, we would be sealed in a large Ziploc™ bag with an air supply. But the purpose behind all things is knowing God. This takes the pressure and demand off of individuals to meet my needs, and puts it back on to God for whom I was created.
Our Permanent vs Transitory Relationships
My summation of all this is that the nagging source of our loneliness is actually a deep hunger for God. We were created to seek, find, and know God – whether we choose to do this or not. Our craving for relationship is ultimately about Him. People are transitory where God is singularly present.
For the born-again believer, our life is hidden in the heavens and our purpose is to know God. All our relationships are for and about Him. My loneliness just might be a signal flag to me that I am settling for something less than my design. If all my relationships are about Him, then I will love others more than I could ever possibly love them in myself. I will give more, love more, be more because it is about Him not them. And as I love Him, He loves them through me with a greater love than I am even capable of. Our purpose for life is to know Him, and when He is at the center and behind of all my relationships, I am not extracting; I am fulfilling my purpose to know my Beloved God and He loves through me.
[For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him [that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly], and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection [which it exerts over believers], and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed [in spirit into His likeness even] to His death, [in the hope] That if possible I may attain to the [spiritual and moral] resurrection [that lifts me] out from among the dead [even while in the body].
Philippians 3:10-11 AMPC