For many years I have been learning a lesson about this life. And I have slowly unfolded it to you over many posts. This has been a huge lesson and a liberating one, too. It is the severing of us from our codependence on ourselves and on others. And note, this will not necessarily isolate us. Quite the contrary, it will liberate us to experience Jesus in every step of our lives. And on our path and along our journey, it will allow others to experience Christ through us, too. The bottom line of this whole revelation is this: It is God and God alone we will see and interact with daily. Yes, I can say, there is none but You alone, oh Lord! We truly have only one relationship not many.
I have charged this hill in a few posts. I wrote about how we live for an audience of One, that there is only one relationship in the life of a believer, and that all relationships stem from our One relationship, which is with Christ. Life is like running a baton race with no other runners. From the starting gun to the finish line, I am running with God alone. No relationship has preeminence over the predominant relationship in my life, which is with Jesus. This can seem extreme to some. People ask, “What about my spouse/my children/my parents?” All these relationships play a part in my life and relationship with God.
No relationship is to have dominance over my relationship with God. Even a relationship with a spouse is actually more about our interaction with our God than that spouse. That seems extreme, but it’s true. And if I take this position, I will be unentangled from any codependent trappings and enter into my proper stance with Christ. He is a better spouse, friend, or relative to the people I love than I ever could be.
And I continually long to know the wonders of Jesus more fully and to experience the overflowing power of His resurrection working in me. I will be one with Him in his sufferings and I will be one with Him in His death. Only then will I be able to experience complete oneness with Him in His resurrection from the realm of death.
Philippians 3:10-11 TPT
The Primary Focus on One Relationship
When Jesus is the primary focus of my life and attention, I can actually serve and love others better because it’s Him not me. It seems counterintuitive, but focusing on the people I love instead of God prevents me from being an effective spouse, friend, or family member. Wow! When I focus on others over God, I rob them of God in me. But if God is my preeminent focus, Jesus’ Life is able to be given through me. If my focus is on Christ, Christ is what I will offer to others. If my focus is on them, all they will get is me. Such a bad trade!
Here is another factor to take into consideration. If my focus is not on the Lord, I will begin to resent you for what I do for you. If I am serving you with a focus on you, I will expect from you a proper response, one you can never give because I am out of order. This is death for you and again robs you of experiencing Christ in me.
My life issues from where my eye rests – God or man. This is why it is so crucial that my gaze be on the Lord continually. This is truly a life or death proposal. One life gaze issues life and the other death. Thank You, Jesus! I have the choice.
While people will come and go throughout my life, Jesus is the only One constant. He is the One who stood at my beginning, He will be there at my end, and at each and every step in between. All my steps are in Him, with Him and for Him. I am His.
I am my Beloved’s, and His desire is for me.
Songs 7:10 ESV
Absolutely liberating message! I choose not to step in the way of another’s view of Christ, & keep my own gaze on Him Who is without…shadow! Christ is always our Solution. Codependence begs for ‘approval’ in every direction..a death grip of duty & expectation. Christ is the Approved One. His approval is on the one who is surrendered into His Life as their life. Eyes on Christ, to receive Him, through His reach & touch in every relationship. I don’t want to miss a moment of HIM! When we are “out of order”, there is no grace, no faith, no… Read more »
This is deep, and really resonates in my spirit. I am going to read this many times over. Thank you so much.
So grateful for you Pamela! Thank you for sharing your joy with this.
We live in a get the job done world. And here comes your statement John, “It is God and God alone you will see and interact with daily.” It should be a clue to us that the words we might associate with getting the job done, never bring Jesus to mind. What we love most about the Lord is how relational He is. He stopped, He stooped down, He touched and held and healed and freed, and He spoke heart words no one else knew…and so much more our own hearts know about. Expertise might line up what will burn… Read more »
Thank you for valuing the messages that have come from that pursuit of Love! It is a joy to know they mean so much to you Helen! Love you
” If my focus is not on the Lord, I will begin to resent you for what I do for you…… I will expect from you a proper response, one you can never give because I am out of order. This is death for you…” and I dare say death for me. This is very convicting, John. It’s so easy to focus on who is front of me, instead of Him. And it only hurts the person I love. Thank you for the reminder. I can’t do anything! I can only look to Him. But that is the answer to… Read more »
You have the answer because you have Him! So perfect. Love you Alex!
Agree- He has been my only constant….- but it is a process… of death to life!-
For sure Arleen. This reality is a process of acceptance through death. But oh how liberating it is on the other side. Love you much! Thanks for commenting!