We are considering the regrets of those who are dying.
The next regret was “I should have loved more.” Jean-Pierre De Caussade said:
“Time is too slow for those who wait,
too swift for those who fear,
too long for those grieve,
too short for those who rejoice
but for those who love . . . time is eternity.”
And his daughters are right, Don loved!
Bronnie Ware said this: “In the end it really comes down to how much you loved, how much love you’ve given and how courageous you have been in loving.” That is a poignant word to use with love: courage. Courage to love! Love is a risk, we all can love somewhat but the courage to give all to love, there are few who are willing to love with that much courage.
At seventeen, Don fell in love with Carole Angier.
And he exclusively, faithfully, delightedly, completely
and unconditionally loved her until that last day, like few men.
I’ll give you story about that. Carole had a dream. Because she is Angier, she’s French to the bone. And she had a dream of speaking French and travelling to France. That was Carole’s dream. It didn’t have any particular goal or ending. But I watched him supply that dream to her. He obtained a scholarship for her to one of the most intensive French schools that the CIA and FBI use in Villefrance (on the Riviera). So he flew her to Villefrance, sent her to school, stayed there and cooked for her. I got there later and cooked for her, and so she studied French in France – just as she dreamed.
He didn’t join her in speaking French. It was her dream. But he paid for it, made it happen, he supported it. He gave his time and everything he had to make her dream happen.
That was Don’s love.
We have many more photos that capture their love affair. It was most unique.
I think maybe in the end that will be the measure of who we are. Do we have the courage to love?
Don would have had no regret that he didn’t follow the dream that he knew was God’s dream. And he would have had no regret that he failed to love the ones he loved. He was, in our friends group, like a big bear. He would come at you, this big man and he would kind of growl. He would say, “Where’s my girl?” And he’d surround you with this big hug.
And he loved men too. Once he gave his heart to love, he encompassed everybody in his world. His grandchildren, how he loved you! He loved his men (his co-workers) Winton, Dale, Charles, and Gary, and he loved men in our group. Don wouldn’t have a regret that he failed to love.
For Don, love meant investment, that’s how he loved. He loved with big uninhibited love, joyfully. He loved genuinely and with generosity.
Let each one of you
love his wife as himself…
Eph. 5:33 ESV
Let your love be sincere [a real thing].
Romans 12:6 Amp