Open my eyes, that I may behold Wonderful things from Your law.
Psalm 119:18 NASB
“Where are You, God?” The past week has unleashed a cacophony of sound and fury signifying nothing but hate to me. Headlines and videos and breaking news of terror and death and war—I was sinking under the deluge. It reached a breaking point yesterday and the Spirit gave me a wake up call: “If evil is all you look at, you’ll drown in it.” I needed my eyes opened to behold Jesus and the wonderful things from His law.
By the time the news broke with the ISIS attacks in Paris, I was already drowning and that just pushed me over the edge. I found myself asking, “Where are You, God?” Over and over, I’d ask, “Where are You?” But I wasn’t really asking where God was; I was asking Him where I could go to find peace and quiet.
When things get particularly loud and bloody, I look for a haven. I don’t think that I’m alone in that either. This time, I buried my head in Pioneer Girl, the long-awaited autobiography of Laura Ingalls Wilder. Wasn’t the world quieter then? Safer? Wasn’t God easier to find? To hear? The answer that I was given was a resounding “NO” on all fronts.
Where are You, God, in all this evil?
Evil is evil is evil. It may take different forms, but there’s never been a haven on this earth since the fall. As I read the life story of a wholesome pioneer girl who was born over 100 years ago, I read about murder, attempted rape, child molestation, infirmity born of disease, abject poverty and hardship, injustice, corporate greed, theft, out-of-control children, babies born out of wedlock, death and disaster and wickedness of the first order. Not a haven to be found! “Where are You, God?!”
Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom.
Luke 12:32 KJV
God isn’t hiding from me; I just can’t see Him because I’m too fixated on the horror playing out in front of me. But the moment that I lift my eyes to seek His face, there He is. There’s my Haven, the only one I’ll ever know. I soak in His Presence, I breathe in His Name, and the darkness falls away from my eyes. And now when I ask, “Where are You, God?,” the answer is there:
Jesus said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Before Abraham was, I am.
John 8:58 KJV
My eyes are opened again, and the deluge recedes. I belong to I AM.