Free From Me

man diving into water

In one of my past posts, called Viewfinder Reality, I wrote about becoming so myopic in my view of life that it obscured my vision of true reality. This is honestly a crippled state of being. There is an idiom about this: “You can’t see the forest for the trees.” It’s very devastating.

When my view of reality is colored by narrow vision rather than by faith, I inevitably will be imprisoned. I literally am captured within the walls of my sight. This makes our worldview limited at best. But today I want to tell you about how God has flooded my vision with Light.

The Spirit of God assailed my limited view in a series of dealings that set me free. For years I was so introspective that I became morose and melancholic. When all that is relies on my acknowledgement and understanding, severe darkness is the result.  I was so depressed and disheartened simply because I was all there was.  I focused so much on myself that the Spirit could barely get my attention.  I was god and the master of my universe with no ability to perform the task. My personality crumbled under the weight rather than being bolstered. I was always self-consumed and aware of only self.  If it wasn’t what I thought about something, it was what I thought someone else was thinking about me. Oh, it was torment! I would leave most situations only to rehash them and verbally abuse my person for saying the wrong thing, responding the wrong way, or just not doing it RIGHT. To spend hours gazing at your own navel makes you more like a snail than a human.  You basically become inverted.  Yuck!

But God began to patiently knock on the walls of my vision and expanded them to Himself.  It was a yielding to His revelation and a surrender to let go of my tightly held boxes.  Then His fresh breeze could come into a once stagnant confinement.  What I started to see was His larger plan and His greater purpose—more, I began to see where I was blind.  And actually the most exciting seeing was this: HIM!

When you abandon the self-consumption as He leads you out, He lifts the fog and reveals Himself.  All of a sudden I was aware of Him, His thoughts, and His heart. Where once it was me, me, and more me, now it’s He!  You see, Jesus gave me His eyes and then I could see Him.

I was opened to the Kingdom, His sovereignty, His life as mine, and the grander span of His universe.  When you see only things in your three-foot circle, you can be controlled and manipulated.  Momentary crisis can crush your countenance and dash your hopes.  Fear is the motivator for those who are self-focused. But God is so much greater in scope than my minuscule understanding. He is working a plan that weaves everything together so I can come to know Him.  And I mean everything!

When the top was blown off my confines, labels and rigid understanding, He was able to wow me in His wonder. Everything is caught in the fascination of knowing Him, seeing Him and being with Him. This doesn’t mean I don’t have bad days, but the dark cloud that followed me everywhere is gone.

I now can be entreated to hope in crisis, and my seeing is wide in personal dealings. A conflict is no longer a catastrophe.  Now, my vision is He, not me. And the liberation of this place is hope.  He capsulizes EVERYTHING in Himself, so He is the beginning and ending of everything. Yes, now all that was – good or bad – and all that will be, and all that is in the present…is Him. My vision has broadened from His revealing. He can show me any purpose from eternity past to future glory because I am His observer and witness, not the focus.

For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things.
[For all things originate with Him and come from Him;
all things live through Him, and all things center in
and tend to consummate and to end in Him.]
To Him be glory forever! Amen (so be it).
Romans 11:36 AMP

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    • Sam


    • Irene

      Open my eyes Lord, I want to see Jesus! John, this post is so good. I read it after reading “His Marvelous Light” and #5 Alive in Union and they all point in the same direction —to Jesus. He Is our All in All.

    • Roddy Young

      I have come to the view that self consciousness and sin consciousness stems from legalistic/religious programming and conditioning . Law based thinking assumes that God is relating to us on the basis of our performance . Under law we we believe we can condition God’s response to us by our behaviour , if we obey , He blesses us , if we disobeyed , He cursed us . Either way it was all down to me . Through this law based paradigm , my mindset was self focused and sin focused . Under grace the holy spirit nurtures sonship identity , union life , under grace the holy spirit through the revelation of the gift of righteousness makes us christ conscious and righteous
      conscious . The focus under law is my behaviour , the focus under grace is what we believe , more precisely under grace it is not so much what we believe about God , but rather what God believes about us , God is fully persuaded about who we are and our standing before is secured through the success of the Cross . The question is do we believe what God believes about us . Under the new covenant the holy spirit bears witness to the obedience of faith as pleasing to Him .

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