I have had a hard time imagining that God wants to spend time with me. It makes sense that I desire to be with Him, because He’s God. I understand my pursuit of Him, but that He would desire to be with me? Not so much. Not that I don’t believe in my relationship with the Father, because I do, deeply. But my concept of His longing to be with me is askew. “He really yearns to be with me?” Guess what is OFF in this scenario? My heart.
Come Spend Time With Me
We spoke about this on the podcast going up this coming weekend. God spoke a word to Martha and she called to tell me what He said. On a recent writing trip, God said He just wanted to spend time with her. He wasn’t looking for her to produce, or work, or write, or even to pray. He just wanted to be with her. When she told me this, it shocked me because it exposed a misconception I have about God. God desires to spend time with me? This reality is beyond my normal realm of belief, but I am desperate to lose these unworthy thoughts. I will believe!
So what is it that makes us think God doesn’t long to just sit with us? At the bottom of this train of thought, it’s because we’re thinking only about self. Me, me, me. “How could the Creator of the universe desire to be with me?” Fill in your blank: I’m too…guilty, fearful, too smart to believe in that stuff, I’m only involved with the Bible and don’t believe in that emotional hokum. Or maybe it’s just, “I’m not ready yet.” None of these take in God’s preferences at all. They don’t account for any of His thoughts or feelings, just mine. I am the center of this train-wreck of thought. Yuk!
His Desire to Spend Time with Me
As Mercy Me sings, “Believe it or not, life is not apparently about me anyways.” If my life here is to satisfy my Creator, and this is my reason for being, why wouldn’t He desire to just sit with me, spend time with me? Well, I am choosing not to foster these thoughts any longer. I am going to believe Him in how He wants to express Himself. I am going to allow God to speak for Himself, rather than speaking for Him.
Yesterday Jennifer reminded me of a post I wrote in 2016. After I went back and read it, I realized it was right in line with this post. At that time, I was questioning whether God looked at me (His creation) the way I look at my paintings (my creative works). Specifically, I wondered if God stares at me fondly, treasuring me and delighting in my process, the life of His creation. I think He’s continually giving me an answer.
There’s the wonder of sunset at evening,
The wonder of sunrise I see;
But the wonder of wonders that thrills my soul
Is the wonder that God loves me.
—George Beverly Shea
And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and He will dwell with them. They will be His people, and God Himself will be with them and be their God.
Revelation 21:3 NIV
Many, O Lord my God, are Your wonderful works which You have done; and Your thoughts toward us cannot be recounted to You in order; if I would declare and speak of them, they are more than can be numbered.
Psalm 40:5 NKJV