I Can Want and Still Not Choose


To want and not choose is kind of like desiring to drive a car to a destination while sitting parked in neutral. Until I put the car in gear, I remain stationary. In the same way, if I “want to” without choosing, I remain motionless.

What does this look like in real life? In the words of Jean-Luc Picard…“Engage!” (hehehe) My want to can fool me into thinking that I’ve made a choice when I really haven’t. When I say I want to do something without engaging my choice to move on it, I deceive myself. I’ve done this. It actually can become a habit. While a want to may feel deeply passionate and can even be expressed with tears, unless I engage my choice, it remains nothing more than a feeling. Try listening to your self-talk; do you want more than you choose?

Choose the Will of God

Choose the Will of God
The Will of the Lord is the intended rudder of our lives. And as long as our choices align with His Will, we stay on course. Our lives are defined by our yes or no. Our “want” masquerades itself as a yes but isn’t.

I am not trying to beat a dead horse with this one, it’s just that important. I have found myself wanting and expecting change from that desire alone. I even saw myself doing it this morning as I was waking up. My vernacular was akin to wanting rather than choosing. I did it in prayer. “God, I want to worship more,” rather than just engaging my choice.

Now, as I said in my last post, just because I have the power to choose doesn’t mean I get everything I want nor that everything will work out perfectly. But engaging my choice is my responsibility and it is how I fall in line with the Life and Will of Christ.


Here is something that I think gives greater clarification from Martha’s bookletDecision:

“When the Lord reveals His will and His standard, He calls for decision. The Lord Jesus wants agreement not acquiescence. He seeks a willing partner, not a mindless slave. Ever He is inspiring a love relationship, and this is the privilege of entering fully the adventure of life with Christ…by delighted choice!


“All things in life are about choosing. Belief is a choice to believe. Doubt is a decision to doubt.”

And in another section:

“You face what you want and what you believe, and from there you choose. And that constant secret work of choice directs your very life. That is the will.


“Decision is not ‘I want’ or ‘I wish’ or ‘maybe.’ The will is always yes or no. No decision is actually a ‘no.’ We choose. In response to every issue and for every event, we choose. However unconsciously and instinctively, quite apart from logic, we decide. We live by our will. So the will sets your course and then what you have chosen leads you. Naturally, fully.


We rule our choices and then our decisions rule us.”

I highly recommend this booklet to you if you haven’t read it already. It is a treasure trove of Life.

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3 years ago

I find this so helpful b/c I would describe my spiritual life as one of “painful wanting” to experience the life of Christ through me (His way of thinking, feeling, being, living) but being stuck with the thoughts and feelings of the flesh almost all the time. The outside of the cup looks good to others, but inside I know it’s dirty. I’ve confessed my struggle with others hoping that would set me on the right road but was mostly told I’m human and being too hard on myself. Recently, I’ve been wrestling with feeling angry with someone who I… Read more »

3 years ago
Reply to  Kim

Wow Kim, thank you so much for sharing and commenting. That is absolutely amazing! Your response was exactly how I would have wanted someone to respond. Asking God the question, “What is my choice and then choosing?” You perfectly applied it to life. Blessing you and thank God for you! So grateful that this was helpful and that you shared your heart!